MERRY, MERRY CHRISTMAS

First of all, let me wish all of you a very merry Christmas and happy new year.  I never got around to buying Christmas Cards and I would feel worse, but I learned years ago that whether you are ready or not, Christmas does not wait - it comes the same time every year!!   Guess what!  I am not ready, but too bad for me because it is here.  I have painted and wallpapered and am making a plan to return to Florida to live.  It is warm and sunny there.  However, someone once said if you want to make God laugh, just make a plan.  And, after all, I made a plan to move to North Carolina and we all know how that worked out!!  So, I am planning to move back to Florida, but trying not to say it too loudly so nothing changes it!!  Anyway, I want to take time to thank all of you so much for letting me grieve to you this last year and a half.  From now on, I hope to bring you more upbeat news and more than a little humor while I seek employment and a place to live!  Meanwhile, peace and joy to all of you.  Love, Ricci

..... who paints!!

So, perhaps it should be "Ricci-thewanderingwidow - who paints"!!  At least, on the side.  The last four days were spent fixing a hole in a ceiling, a hole in a wall and resurfaceing part of the ceiling that was coming down.  All of this occurred because I emailed and old friend to see if she wanted to have dinner with an old sailing partner.  The dinner was fun, of course, because we always had fun when I lived in Cleveland earlier!  (By earlier, I mean the 70's).  Anyway, after dinner she asked if I would look at her project, which she needed done before the end of the year.  I looked, left, thought about it, then told her it was completely out of my field of expertise.  Then it got tricky, because she looked like she was about to cry and had a look of abject panic on her face.  Therefore, I gave in and told her I would try. Seems lik it would be easy, right?   Trim the existing wallboard to an even size; cut a new piece to fit, nail it up, tape it, paint it and presto chango!!  Not so easy (1) if there are no studs to which to nail the new drywall, or trying to get a perfect fit overhead!!  There is a reason carpenters make money!!  Nevertheless,  the finished product looks really good!  However, that just means I painted a very nice picture because underneat the drywall is not pretty.  So, I guess I did a little "smoke and mirrors" to get this to look alright.  It did remind me, however, that I certainly enjoy and little painting and even wallpapering.  Drywall, though - especially piecing it - is quite a stretch.  My friend, thank Heaven, is quite pleased with the finished look, so we just have to hope the home inspector is also.  If he is happy, who knows, perhaps I will be the only 70 year old to start a construction business!!  ONLY KIDDING!!!  But, tomorrow, I am heading to Chicago to visit another friend and paint her apartment, only to return on Monday and start on my sister's lower level.  Whoever originated "when it rains, it pours" definitely kidding!!  After that comes Christmas and New Year's and I plan to start back to Florida (and sunshine, heat and golf) around the second, with a stop in Charlotte, NC on the way.  Hopefully, I will be able to find work there, so I can find somewhere to live and actually start my life again.  Just putting one foot in front of the other and moving on.  Thanks, as usual, for checking and keeping tabs on me.  You have no idea how putting this all down has helped.  Thanks so much, and I wish all of you a wonderful Christmas and New Year. Ricci

AT LEAST I CAN STILL COOK!!!!

Okay, the kitchen is finally clean again (and that is a miracle, because, like my mother before me, once the dinner is ready, it looks like the army as been through the kitchen and practiced maneuvers!!!), the guests have returned home and I have the whole house to myself for another day since the kids decided to stay in Peoria an extra day!  !  They are like little tiny shadows who manage to trip me about every ten steps because they are afraid I am leaving  them.

Dinner was very, very good.  The turkey was moist, the stuffing good, the gravy not a disaster, and all the usual side dishes were good.  I don't know how everyone else liked it, but I found a new recipe for brussel sprouts that I thought was excellent.  (It only took me 1 1/2 hours to slice all of those little sprouts into thin pieces!)  My younger sister baked pumpkin pies, and, of course, they were excellent.  The older one just  brought bad wine!  You wouldn't think there would be bad wine in this day and age, but she managed to find it.

There should be a rule, however, that guests should take at least half as long to eat the meal as it does to prepare it!!

Even the weather was reasonable for Cleveland.  Sunny and pretty warm.  However, I know what is coming and hopefully, I will be back in Florida before the worst of it hits!!

I hope all of you had a wonderful Thanksgiving!  Life is good!  Thanks for checking.  Ricci

MAN OH MAN - IS IT COLD!!!

Wow, and the winter hasn't even begun!!  It is a good thing the kids are cute!  So, here I am in cold Bay Village, Ohio.  At least the Y here lets me in.  The kids are cute - as I said before - and that is probably because they are in school all day!  This family will be going to Peoria for Thanksgiving, so I will be cooking here for my sisters.  Hopefully, I will remember how to accomplish an entire meal.  (I am certain wine will be involved to help me along!!).  It is a good thing I have some things to do while this far north, because I am actually anxious to find a job, a place to live, and unpack all of the things that will remind me of a happy life together.  It has taken a while, but it finally happened.  It will really be nice to see sunshine 90% of the time instead of 10%.  Now, I have to make an actual grocery list, after first planning a menu. (Well, this might be harder than I thought!!)  I will let you know!  Meanwhile, thanks for checking in and have a wonderful Thanksgiving!  Ricci

She's ba..a..ck!!

Yes, my dear readers, I think I am actually back!!  After a great visit to my younger sister's, I have moved on to Bay Village to see my older son, older sister, oldest granddaughter and some friends.  Painting at Gail's was great therapy and I will be doing some at my other sister's and in Chicago.  After Christmas and some stops along the way back, I will be returning to Florida, where I will find a job.  Then, I will find somewhere for Gina and I to unpack all the stuff that is in storage in New Port Richey.  For the first time in almost a year and a half, I am actually anxious to set up housekeeping in a place of my own.  It will be strange and difficult to do this without Mike, but it is really home to me as it was to him, and I have so many happy memories of life there with him, that I am finally certain that it is the place for me to be. (To say nothing of the fact that it is not nearly as cold there as it has been EVERYWHERE ELSE I have been.  So stay tuned, because while we are trying to neutralize Gail's house for sale, while Meigan is trying to make her home look like her!  So, happily, life is truly looking up.  It was a great thing, though, to take the trip across the country and I am very happy to have done it.  However, it is time to light somewhere.  Will check with you later.  Thanks for checking.  Ricci



SENSE OF HUMOR 101

Painting walls always serves as great therapy - so that is exactly what I have been doing.  I will finish this job by the end of next week, then probably will move on to my older son's house.  (He has promised to give me two weeks notice before he throws me out, so I feel quite comfortable!!) All in all, life is still good - my sense of humor remains in tact - as does my health, so I will enjoy Christmas (except for the cold, of course) in Ohio, then got back to Florida, hopefully to find gainful employment and a place of my own to live.  I think it will finally be nice to look at all of the stuff I put into storage.  It should be like Christmas to unpack it all.  And, you know, it is said that everything happens for a reason, so perhaps I just needed to be reminded of what great family and friends I have for support.  Hopefully, I will be able to return the support in kind someday.  Thanks for checking.  Ricci

Moving On

You know, I don't know who wrote the comment, but I assure you it was not wanting "space" that caused them to throw me out.  However, of course, I will forgive my son, even though I am certain it will be a while before we speak again.  And that is okay.  This goes a lot deeper than "space".  Actually, I think there were underlying circumstances of which I was unaware before I got to NC.  Also, I am not certain that my son actually communicated to his fiancee/now wife, the same thing he was communicating to me.  But, it is neither here no there now.  I will be fine and they will be fine, whatever they do.  Life is way, way too short to get caught up in name calling and blaming.  It, like some marriages, just didn't work out.  I do think, however, that the parting could have been better - along with back pay, pay back for money spent for food for the bistro, or even the tips that were on credit card.  Silly, silly me.  It is okay, though, I will live without it.  Of course, I love my son deeply, I just saw a side of him I did not realize existed.  Certainly, we will both come through it okay.  Meanwhile, I am wandering again (luckily, I saw a banner the other day that said "all who wander are not lost".  That is good, because I certainly am not lost.  I was granted a great sense of humor and survival, so I will be visiting family for a while, seeing what I can do for them in exchange for their wonderful support and then returning to Florida to look for a job and find a place to live!  The insane part is that I will be in the cold from now through December (just the time most people go to Florida).  Oh well, no one ever said I did things in the right order.  Gina is enjoying the weather and the resident dog here and tomorrow I will actually start swimming again to regain what sanity I have left.  So, life, as usual, is pretty good - you know, there are always some little quirks along the way to keep us on our toes.  Thanks for checking.  Ricci

THROWN OUT!!!

So, how is this for an ever-changing present moment??  Tonight, I got thrown out of my son’s house.  Forget that I was supposed to be able to stay there for a month while they are away.  After all, the State of North Carolina is closing them down, so they have to go to Europe for a month!  And, they are taking four teenagers!  Here, of course, is the rub – what little money I was paid, was spent giving them a wedding shower, which turned into their wedding.  I might add that the girl who provided the house and another who helped with the food, and the guy who baked thee cake and a few others received thank you notes.  Naturally, I was not on the list.  Now they need “space”, because someone will surely die of overcrowdedness in the next 14 days.  It was okay if I was a working bee for however many hours they needed.  It was okay to decide (after I lost my temper and “yelled” (the forbidden sin), to go to a cabin with a friend (of course no “space” was needed then) for three days, without telling me that they had given another couple the weekend off.  I suppose they felt it was adequate punishment.  

The crux of this was that on Monday, I said I thought they were very rude due to the fact that they sat on a couch across from me, talking softly, texting and emailing.  The only time anyone spoke to me is if I asked a question.  Of course, the whole issue was avoided because I raised my voice.  Seems if you raise your voice, whatever the issue, no matter how relevant, it is nonexistent as punishment to the person yelling.

It also seems to me, that if you really don’t want someone around, you definitely will not take presents or money or anything else that one might construe as acceptance.

I never thought I would see a day sadder than the day Mike died, but today is because I just lost a son who is alive.  It is interesting, though, that I was all right until I became the mother-in-law.  So, I guess the rule is, when your son is getting married, ask the bride-to-be what personality you are supposed to have.  Then if you don’t have it, she can decide whether to take on the family.  Obviously, my personality is only okay if I am giving you something or doing something for you – and remaining quiet!. 

Isn’t is also nice to know that upon being asked to leave, no one bothered to ask if I have enough money to get anywhere!  Of course, they need the money for travel.  You think I sound a little bitter?  Perhaps  Actually, it would have been better if he had stabbed me in the heart.  Hopefully, while in Europe, they will observe the respect children have for their parents and it will wear off.

Anyway, now that I have gotten that off my chest (aren’t you glad you tuned in?) I guess I will try to get some sleep.  Fat chance, however, since I was up all night last night crying, and tonight I will probably be awake from so much anger.

If this is a test, surely I am not passing.  I will pack my car and drive somewhere tomorrow, but I will not be answering my cell phone because I do not want to cry.  Oh well, I guess I will have to learn to be alone somewhere else.  Certainly, there is much more humor in this than I am displaying at the moment.  (Like the fact, that I would like to knock Shawn across the room – myself, too, for not facing the fact that the excitement of a new marriage, the prospect of a month in Europe IN 14 DAYS were not enough to remove him from his self-involvement.  It is astounding to realize that as the mother, you are not worth 14 days.  Angry?  Oh yes.  The good thing is that I will recover, but I am certainly going to miss the person I thought he was.  Will try to add some more humor next time.  Thanks for checking.  Ricci

ON THE GO - ONE MORE TIME!!!

Oh, my friends, I said I would write more often as my life developed.  However, that blessed ever changing present moment has caught up with me once more.  Seems the State of North Carolina wants all of their tax money and the Bistro just doesn’t have it.  The economy affects everyone!!!  Anyway, the Bistro will be closing for good on the 1^st of November, the kids leave for Europe on the 8^th and I will once again be trying to figure out the next move.

As it stands, right now (and I say right now because one never knows!!) I will stay here while they are gone and try to figure out what is going on in my brain.  Since I have not actually been by myself since Mike died, this will be the chance for me to try it.  Luckily, I did not sign a lease for anything here.  So, after they return, I will go to Bay Village and spend December with my son, Scotty, his family and my sisters.  It will be nice to see them all again (and, hopefully, I can maintain my sense of humor while I am freezing my ___ off!!)  Just another chapter for the book, I guess.   Since I am (knock on wood) lucky enough to be healthy, basically happy, and have a great family and friends, I am sure things will just be fine.  I though I was finished with Florida when Mike died, but perhaps not.  I hate, hate, hate being cold; as you know, I also found I do not like the mountains and there was nothing about California that made me long to move there.  O, it could be that I was wrong about being finished with Florida (after all, I hold the world’s record for being wrong).

So, if anyone knows anyone who might need an employee – older than the usual employee; however, able to work circles around younger employees and in great physical shape, please let me know.  Will let you know, of course, what the next step is – as soon as I know – and will let you know how I actually am ALL ALONE, with the exception of 2 dogs, 1 cat and 1 hamster.  Thanks, as usual, for checking.  Ricci

P. S.  Today, (10/24/11), I played golf with two of the guys who come in for coffee, and had a great time.  Both very nice men!  Anyway, that was fun.  Now, of course, I have to figure out my life.  Well, one cannot say that my life is boring.  The only problem is that when I get up in the morning, I think I am 30 – that is, of course, until I look in the mirror to put on my make-up. Then I can’t help wondering what happened to the person I thought I was when I got up. Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!!  Next installment, soon, I promise,  Ricci.  

Twenty-eight years of living together & twenty year of wedded bliss

Okay, so I am finally able to write this without crying!  Today would have been our 20th wedding anniversary, because we lived together 8 years first.  My plan had been to renew our vows - however, you know how the "best laid plans of mice and men" go.  I would say he took and extreme way of getting out of it!  I'm just saying.....  So, now I have to move forward.  Tonight, I looked at a little house (about which, I am sure, was written, "there once was a man with a crooked little mouse...." because this house was really, really crooked.  I may have to work two jobs, but I will not be living in a crooked house.

When we lived in Columbus, Mike wanted to live where all the Italians lived, so he picked this house that was so little and had only ONE bathroom!  The kitchen was so small that on the left side of the sink, it was exactly wide enough for the coffee maker.  On the other side, it was about 24 inches wide, but the cabinets were so low, you couldn't even put a plate in a dish drainer - and I am not exaggerating.  The only reason I agreed to move there was it had a front porch (which I think ought to be mandatory on every house in America).  Mike pooh-poohed the porch!  That is, until I put furniture on it.  Then it not only became his porch - he never wanted to live anywhere again that didn't have a porch.  Well, after about six months in this house, I told him he was never allowed to pick the place we lived again.  Needless to say, he will not be helping me this time.  But, I will try to make him proud of wherever I place our "stuff", wherever he may be.

So, happy anniversary, honey.  One thing is for sure - there will never be anyone again who loves me as much as you did.  I hope you knew how much I appreciated it.  Love, Ricci

HAVE YOU MISSED ME?

Well, hello.  Here I am again!  Back in Carolina Beach and back at work - which, right now, is quite slow due to the season ending.  Needless to say, we are hoping it will pick up again soon.  I had a great time in Florida - visiting friends, playing bad golf and drinking.  However, I did find I do not miss Florida.  I found it very sad to see all the "stuff" that was ours together! 

Well, it is time to move on.  So, I will be looking for somewhere to live on Carolina Beach.  Until I actually move into my own abode, so to speak, I will not actually start living a real life.  The kids are great, but they need their space and I am certain I need mine.  (Though, what I will do with it at this time is beyond me .  However, I am sure I will find some ways to amuse myself!)

Perhaps it is time to rename the blog.  Maybe Wandering Widow Stops Wandering and forges a life.  Maybe I can figure out how to do this and lead some other widows on a happy trail. 

The biggest challenge will be finding somewhere I can afford that is actually livable!  I definitely need two bedrooms in order to have guests - and I certainly want visitors!  Living here in the winter will probably be quite a challenge because it was in the high 60's by the time I returned from Florida (where it was in the 90's) and I thought I was going to freeze.  However, I managed to walk the 7 mile walk on the beach on Monday morning and was quite comfortable once I got started!

So, dear friends, we are definitely starting a new chapter and I hope to amuse you and enlighten you as to how the Wandering Widow moves forward in her life.  As usual, thanks for checking.  I will definitely be blogging more again.  Ricci

IT'S A BIRTHDAY PARTY - NO IT'S A SHOWER - NO IT'S A WEDDING!!!

Okay.   So, this is how it went.  When Amy and Shawn decided to get engaged and announced that they would be trying to get a wedding together by October 15.  They wanted to be married before they leave for Europe in November.  Well, I thought, if there was going to be a shower for them, it had better be soon.  Since I am leaving for two weeks, the date came down to September 10.  I recruited the few friends of Amy’s that I knew and we started planning.  After much wine and discussion, we settled on a party at Sharon’s house and making it a couple’s shower.  Also, it was to remain a secret!  Well, let me tell you how difficult it is to get names and addresses from this generation!!  Everything is in their I phones and the phones are attached to their bodies!  After much nagging about getting a wedding list together, I managed to secure a number of names – and addresses.  We ended up with about 30 people, which provided a lovely number for a party.  Sharon worked like a dog to make her house pretty, and invited Amy and Shawn for dinner under the pretense that they were having a barbeque to celebrate mutual birthdays.  Luckily, they bought it.  Also, since a cook was let go because of drinking, they were so busy, they did not have a chance to pay attention to me.  (And since I sleep on their couch and do not have a room, it is really difficult to keep anything secret.  Everything is in my purse, so I occasionally look like the little old lady in the cartoons who is clutching her purse under her chin!!)  They were surprised – and Amy was especially surprised because her favorite uncle and aunt had driven down from Greensboro to surprise her. There was wine and beer and food and very happy spirits PLUS someone who actually could legally marry them.  All of a sudden, we had a wedding.  What a fun, fun night it was.  Actually, it is how everyone should get married.  All stress of preparations and worry about hurting feelings is out of the way.  There were a few important people missing, (but since it wasn’t the first time for either of them, the missing will survive).  Everyone on Carolina Beach kept the secret and, as Max said, who knew the surprise would be on us.  That is why I have not posted lately.  The surprise party has occupied 100% of my mind, just trying to keep it secret!!  But, I will definitely catch up soon and tell you about beach living!!  Welcome to my new daughter-in-law, Amy and congratulations to Shawn.  Thanks, of course for checking.  Ricci

THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING, THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING!

Okay, so I was told I should tell my story like I would tell it to Potluck, so here we go.  First of all, once the hurricane was named, it was like “The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming”!  Obviously, weather people don’t get much of a chance to expound on anything because by the time they show it to you 9 million times, you would think the world is coming to an end.  I don’t mean to make light of it, but there is so much hype, you just get tire of it.   So, we went from a buzzing little island on Thursday, to a “ghost island” on Friday.  There was coffee sold, but hardly any lunch.  There were about 8 of the usual suspects on Friday, so we decided to walk down to the ocean to see the waves.  The ocean is literally 360 of my steps from the Treehouse.  The waves were roaring and quite amazing to see, but the kicker was the blowing sand!!  It pelted the dogwater out of you.  It only got part of me because I had on jeans, but Shawn, Amy and Auri had on shorts.  At least snow melts when it hits you.  Sand, on the other hand, just sticks to you and in you and in your clothes.  Later, we were silly enough to go look again.  By that time, it was raining cats and dogs, so we just got soaked.  Finally, we had enough sense to close the Treehouse and go home.  After much food and wine and card playing with the kids, Amy suggested I move my car into the middle of the cul de sac so it would NOT be hit by a tree.  “No, says I, there might be an ambulance that needs to get down the street.”  Silly me.  As you know by my previous blog, the very tree about which she was speaking, fell on my Tonka.  Anyway, we lost power at the house around 8:30 p.m., which was okay until we all went to sleep.  My goodness, how quickly your body responds to NO air conditioning – and I don’t mean in a good way.  Anyway, since I was up early anyway, I went to the Treehouse to see if anyone wanted coffee. There has never been a day in my life when I made so many people so happy at once.  Seems we were the only game in town that morning, so everybody liked us.  We then had a few folks for lunch, but the bulk was definitely in for coffee!!  Today is Tuesday, and everyone has just about cleaned up all of the branches in their yards and the city of Carolina Beach is about to start picking them up from the front of the houses.  Now we are back to beautiful weather.  However, this season extends all the way to the end of November, so stay tuned and I may be able to give you another report.  Thanks for reading.  Ricci

I DO HAVE A TONKA TRUCK!!!

So, we lost power last night and it was a little warm sleeping.  Actually, at one point, I thought I was going backward and going through menopause again!!  Anyway, I digress.  About 5 a.m. I decided to survey my surroundings the best I could, given that there are no lights in our neighborhood.  Well, lo and behold, I see a huge tree branch laying right across the front of my car.  Luckily, Amy and Shawn were also awake, so we went to see if I still had a windshield.  Yep!  Shawn held up  the branch and I backed it out safe and sound.  So, Mike, I owe you a debt of gratitude for leaving me a Tonka.  I guess you actually knew what you were doing when you bought it.  I love you!! R icci

GOOD NIGHT IRENE - WE HOPE!!!

So, here we are, waiting and watching, hoping Irene decides to take a little trip east - way east, as a matter of fact.  Right now, it is so pretty, you would never believe a rip roaring storm is making its way up the coast.  Tomorrow will be spent buying ice and batteries and hoping we don't need them.  I'll let you know as soon as we know.  Thanks for checking. Ricci 

Hooray for Ricci....

Hooray for Ricci, Hooray for Ricci, someone in the crowd is yelling..... !  Wonder of wonders, I actually shot a 94 today.  That would be the first time I have broken 100 since Mike died.  I would really rather shoot 200 and have him be here, but I don't seem to have that option, so I will revel in finally breaking 100.  I know he would be happy for me that I did it - and I am extremely happy for myself.  Now, of course, I don't know whether it is my new Adams clubs, or perhaps I am coming to grips and on the road to recovery.  Don't know which, but the 94 made me feel like I was at least still alive.  Thanks for tuning in - just wanted you to know there is hope for the old girl yet!  Ricci

WALKING, WALKING, WALKING!!!

So, I have been here since the 4th of July and have logged quite a few miles!!  I have been walking the beach at least 6 days a week.  One route is about 7 1/4 miles.  It is such a peaceful walk.  While he would not have enjoyed the walk past about 30 feet, Mike would certainly have enjoyed the sunrise and throwing a line in the ocean.  It will be interesting to see how much I enjoy it once the summer leaves and colder weather sets in.  The dogs have been loving it, though.  About twice or three times a week I take the dogs.  In October, they will be able to run free without my getting into trouble.  Also, it will be easier on them because they will not be so hot.  My poor car will never be the same, however.  They hit the beach, run for a while, roll in the sand and run in and out of the water.  (Not very far in, however; just enough to get those paws wet and sandy.)  So, when we get back to my car, they get into the back seat and immediately see how much sand they can shake off of themselves onto my back seat!!  Since it has been over a year, I suppose I ought to be better at this, but, you know, sometimes it is just so sad and unbelievable that Mike will never be back.  It is still so very sad that sometimes I just don't know what to do.  So, tomorrow, I will go back on  the golf course and hope my new clubs deliver the miracle I expect!  My younger son is getting married on the beach the 15th of October, so there is certainly a lot of excitement here.  And, they are leaving for Europe the 8th of November for a month, so it will be quite a year for them.  As for me, while it is delightful to be around  them, I am definitely looking forward to being alone for a little while, if for no other reason, than to get a little more perspective.  By then, I will hopefully know for certain if this is where I want to settle.  Thanks for listening, by virtue of reading!!  Ricci

HOW I LOVE ADAMS GOLF!!!

The best customer service ever.  And, yesterday, I actually got a chance to try out the whole set!  Unfortunately, the first nine, I was in nearly every sand trap!  Back nine, though, was a lot better - several pars evern!!  Not back in the 90's yet, but I think I can see it coming!  Even nicer was the fact that I was put with three women who were my peers, polite, nice and fun to play golf with.  The only drawback was that they invited me to join their golf league, which I would have been happy to do.  However, in order to belong, you have to belong to that golf course.  If I win the lottery, I will be sure to join.  Meanwhile, they will hopefully let me play again as "guest" substitute.  I will go out again tomorrow and see if I am that lucky!  I will be sure to let you know.  Ricci   

WORKING, WORKING, WORKING

So, here I am in North Carolina - making coffee, serving wine, cooking, busing tables - - all of the fun things in life!  Mostly, it is really fun!  However, it is taking away time from golf - in fact, I haven't even had the time to try out my new full set of golf clubs.  And, I am certain, that with these new clubs, I will be able to break 100 once again!  Theoretically, I was going to give them a try this morning, but the opener got sick, so I had to cancel.  Perhaps tomorrow.  I  am so excited to try them!  Since I cooked with Shawn Saturday, Sunday brunch and dinner with Axton, I probably would have been too tired to hit the ball well anyway!  Next week, my younger sister will be in South Carolina, so I will make a little 5 1/2 hour drive to see her.  That, of course, will be fun! (If only I had some red slippers to click together when returning!!)  We are crowded here, but good.  Now, when I go to Florida in September, it will be just a little more crowded, because I will be picking up my clothes - even though I don't remember what is there.  I really need self-rotating tubs so I can get to something without moving all of them.  Oh well!, at least it will be another adventure.  Thanks for listening - once again.  Ricci  

Edisto Beach, SC

Well, time marches on.  I spent last Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday in Edisto Beach, SC, with my friends from Tampa, Judy & Jim and their friends, Russ and Sue.  What a good time we had.  The best thing is - I have had some hearing loss and I can never understand what the kids say without having to have them repeat most of it.  HA!  We all have the same problem. And, since we do, everybody spoke clearly, concisely and loud enough for all of us to hear!!  Judy turned 70, so we had a little party and it was quite fun.  Not that the kids are difficult.  I have been working with Shawn at the Bistro so I can take care of it while they are in Europe and it has been a lot of fun (in addition to a lot of work).  The teenagers are also fun, but there is something about drinking with your peers!!  It is still unbelievable to me that I will never see Mike again.  When I am walking the beach early in the morning, I just know he would really, really love it.  Happy hour is just not the same either!  Monday, I received the rest of my clubs from Adams Golf and I will be trying them out on Monday - providing a hurricane does not find its way here.  I will certainly let you know how they work.  Since Mike died, I have not broken 100.  Hopefully that will change on Monday.  Please wish me luck.  Thanks again for checking in.  Ricci   

STILL HERE!!

Hi!  Yes, hard to believe, but I am still here.  Alive and in North Carolina!  Walking the beach, waiting tables, making coffee and even cooking at the Treehouse Bistro!!  Fun, definitely - hard work, most definitely!  However, at least I know I can still do everything.  The only thing is  that I do not have a life of my own, so to speak.  Today, I am driving to Edisto Beach, SC to visit Judy and Jim from Florida.  Tiny drive - only 4 1/2 hours!!  It will be great to see them!  When I return, I guess I will join a new comers club and see if I can meet some other folks.  All my new friends here, so far, are Amy and Shawn's age, and while they are delightful, it would be good for them and for me to find some friends of my own with whom to play golf and socialize!!  So, I will be working on that.  It is still difficult to believe it has been over a year since Mike died - and, even though we were definitely not "joined at the hip", it is still hard to believe we are never having happy hour again.  When I am walking on the beach, I can't help but think how much he would have loved the way of life on this island.  It is so laid back!  So sorry he missed it.  I have only gotten to try my new clubs once, so far, but I fully intend to make great use of them when I get back from Ediston Beach.  After Labor Day, when "the season" is over, I will actually start investigating places to live.  By October or November, I am thinking people will be wanting to rent their places again and perhaps I will be able to find a little home of my own.  Otherwise, folks, life is pretty darned good.  All of my parts are working, I can still work, can still hit a golf ball and I am certain I will be making new friends soon.  So goes widowhood!  Thanks again for tuning in.  Ricci

LET'S PLAY CATCH-UP!!!

Hi!  Sorry, I haven't gotten back to you all, but since I got back to North Carolina, I have been so busy working and cleaning, I have actually been too tired to write!  Well, we left off in Mt. Rushmore.  From there I went to Overland Park, KS where my nephew and his family welcomed me with open arms.  Jimmy took me to play golf, but we both played terribly.  However, it didn't dampen the fun!! 

And, speaking of golf clubs, I have had the greatest thing happen to me.  Before leaving NC for my trek, I purchased a set of golf clubs.  I really wanted to get Adams V3s because I was told they were the newest and best.  However, Dick's Sporting Goods did not carry them, and the salesman assured me that the Tight Lies would be just as good.  Wrong! Wrong! Wrong!  I played with them all the way across the country and it was like hitting with dead clubs.  So, while in Reno, I wrote to the president of Adams, explained my plight, and asked if I could send them back the Tight Lies and pay the difference for the V3s.  Surprise, surprise, surprise.  Tomorrow, my new V3s will arrive at Dick's and I get to trade in the Tight Lies even up!  Now that is GREAT customer service.  I can hardly wait to try them out.  It is one of the best things that happened this year.  That, of course, is not counting everyone who has just been delightful to me!

Driving from Mt. Rushmore to Overland Park was an adventure because of all the flooding in that part of the country.  A 9 hour drive took about 13 hours due to all of the detours.  It was beautiful, though, when I got into Kansas and Missouri - all green and rolling hills!

Now, I will be in North Carolina for a while and see how this works out.  The kids will be going to Europe for a month in November and I will be taking care of business.  So these next couple of months will be a great test of whether to relocate here.  We'll certainly see!

Gina stayed here while I went across the country so she wouldn't be confused or stressed and when I got back, she was quite miffed with me.  She is sleeping on my head again, so I think she has forgiven me.

It is so difficult to believe that Mike has been gone a year!  It has just left such a terrible, terrible void in my life.  Now I know how his mother felt.  She told me that when she died, the first thing she was going to do was slap her husband's face for leaving her!!  Perhaps that is not such a bad idea!!  Thanks for checking.  Ricci

CODY WYOMING

It is so much fun when you see someone you have not seen in 25 years and you pick up a conversation like you had just been at a pajama party a few weeks ago!!  Jeanette and Joe have no changed - they remain the same nice people they were when I fixed them up in 1957!  Cody is very pretty - wide open spaces as written about in cowboy songs!!  The drive from Reno was through another set of mountains and, honestly, the mountains are all looking the same - only some still have snow!  I had to come through Yellowstone National Park, which is beautiful - even had "buffalo roaming" on the highway.  That is kind of scary because they are really, really big.  However, a million other people were either driving through Yellowstone or looking for a campsite because it took over an hour to go 10 miles!!   When I got to the sign that said "Welcome to Cody", I called Jeanette to say according to the gps, I would be there in about an hour.  I left the message on her answering machine.  As soon as she came back into the house, she called me wondering how I could be an hour away since Cody is only 6 miles wide.  (You know, it's hell to get old!!)  I forgot that I had come back through another time zone and unlike my cell phone, my car clock does not change automatically.  So, the gps was giving me the correct time, but my auto clock was still on Reno time.  So, I was actually about a minute and a half from her.  Anyway, I got there, we had great visit - and I was off again.  Heading toward starting a life.  Thanks for checking.  Ricci

LEAVING RENO

Today, I left Reno to start the trek back east.  Margaret Ann is Mike's cousin, who adopted me as a cousin when I married Mike.  She is an only child whose mother was tragically killed.  Therefore, I have adopted her as a sister.  So, she went from being an only child to have 3 sisters.  Good news - I am not the middle any longer.  M.A. cannot possibly know how much it meant to me to be able to stay in Reno as long as I did (I'm sure she thought I was "The Man Who Came To Dinner"!!!!)  There were no suggestions about what I should do.  We played a card game - SKIPBO - and it is truly addictive.  A "freindly" little card game in which each party sees how mean she can be to the other one.  Most mornings we played "just one hand", but went almost to lunch.  Very, very fun.  I got to play in her late husband's golf tournament - with Meg's son and grandson.  We came in 3rd and had a great time.   Occasionally, we would even go to a casino (imagine doing that in RENO!!),  Of course, I would end up losing every time.  However, Monday we decided to give it one last shot and I walked out having tripled my $50.  That was probably another sign it was time for me to leave. (Actually, I left Reno on Wednesday (June 22), but have not been anywhere where I could get on the internet to post this!)  Anyway, I had a great, great time in Reno.  Everyone was just great and Hogan will really miss me because I took him on walks on the mountains.  A really, really nice dog.  So for the last almost two months, I have played wild games of SKIP-BO, drunk a more than sufficient amount of wine, and laughed a great deal.  Incidentally, MA has a boyfriend, who is quite a nice fellow.  Also, Carol and I spent a week in Lake Tahoe, which is always beautiful.  We had a lovely time; however, the altitude affected Carol's breathing, so we did not expend a great deal of energy!  I will get this out and let you know about Cody, WY another day.  Thanks for tuning in again.  Ricci

TIME TO MOVE FORWARD

Well, I have been driving around the country trying to figure out my life.  This week I have been at Lake Tahoe, and it is incredible.  It is beautiful from Vista Pointe and beautiful from the paddle wheel boat on which we took a 2-hour cruise.  However, I still have been waiting for a sign.  Finally, today I got it – from my younger son, who needs vacation help.  So, next Wednesday, I will leave for Cody, WY and see a friend with whom I went from kindergarten through high school.  Since we have not seen each other in 25 years, it will be really fun.  From there, I will travel to Rapid City, SD so I can see Mt. Rushmore while I am all the way out here; then on to Overland Park, KS to visit my nephew and family.  That will be my final visit for a while because from Kansas (without any red glass slippers, I might add) I will travel straight to North Carolina to find out what need to learn before he leaves.  Enough, dilly-dallying, I believe.  It is actually time to start living some kind of regular life without Mike.  It will not be the easiest thing I have ever done, but I have great memories, and had a great love and will be fine.  I will just have to put off a few side trips, like Florida, Ohio, Illinois and Colorado until September.

This week Carol has been trying to teach me to knit – something as easy as a dishcloth; however, I believe that by the third day, she was drinking quite a bit of vodka to be able to stand my ineptitude.  I am learning, though.  By the time I am 70, I am certain I will have finished at least one.  Thanks for reading.  Ricci

ONE YEAR!!

Today is the 6th of June, so tomorrow is actually the one year anniversary date of Mike's death.  However, to me, it is a year today because it was on a Monday.  It is almost impossible to believe that it has been a year already.  It would even be better if I could tell you that all of this traveling has been a great help in dealling with it.  The traveling and the people have been wonderful, but instead of providing me with some great insight, it has only enabled me to put off really facing a life without him.  So, right now I am feeling like a "lost girl", only, unlike the "lost boys", I don't know how to find Never-never Land.  Obviously, this day has been preying on my mind because I have been dreaming about Mike every night.  They are so real - and he looks great - just like he did when I met him.  We all like to think that life was perfect when our loved one was still here.  Well, of course, it wasn't perfect, but it was great.  And Mike opened my heart to love again and gave me more peace and feeling of safety than anyone in my life!  My friend, Carol, is coming from Chicago tomorrow and we will be going up to Lake Tahoe for a week (and freezing, if the weather doesn't suddenly improve).  After that, I guess I will actually have to turn around and head back east to make an actual life for myself.  I will do it, for sure, but it just won't be as much fun!  Someone asked me last week if I was over it - well, I don't think you ever really "get over it", but you do come to terms with it simply because life gives you no choice.  I will just always remeber how much better my life was for having had Mike Maratea in it.  Thanks for listening.  Ricci

Santa Barbara

Ordinarily, I would wait to post so they aren't so  close together, but I have to tell you Santa Barbara is the most beautiful place I have seen!  One would probably have to have a really decent job to live there, however.  Another reason I am telling you this now, is I can feel the sadness creeping in, so I wanted to write about SB while I was still really up about it.  Actually, I am so up about it that if I had had money, I would not have left.  You know, sometimes reality sucks!  It was still beautiful, though, and the drive up was also beautiful.  You are on the highway in the mountains overlooking the Pacific Ocean and it is breathtaking!!  I even saw some "amber waves of grain" after I left there while driving back to Reno.  Now you could say, I have seen America The Beautiful!!!  Talk to you soon.  Ricci

California - Here I Come - or Came.

 I don't know what I expected when I got to California.  The Pacific Ocean is beautiful, but I guess I expected all of it to be beautiful (like the movies, I guess).  Sunday, I put Margaret Ann back on the plane to Reno and drove north to LA.  I stayed with the son of a friend of mine.  They are delightful, and have two really, really cute children  I can say that because I don't have to be around when they become teenagers!!  However, the really fun part of the trip was seeing someone I haven't seen in around 25 years.  Steve was a friend, a great skater (because we all grew up at the ice rink) and in 7th grade I was madly "in love" with him.  However, our friend, Sharon, was also in love with him and she assured me he would definitely like her.  And, as it turned out, she was correct.  But, we were still friends (because he did not know how I felt, so he could not have felt awkward about it!)  And, even though I occasionally liked a boy, I was never secure enough to actually be involved!  Okay!! Enough history.  We talked, talked, talked about school (we relived, jr. high, high school and winterhurst) about ex-spouses, Mike, children, grandchildren and just about everything else under the sun; drove through Redondo Beach, El Segundo, Santa Monica, Venice, other suburbs of LA and, finally, to Rodeo Drive.  Now, that is a beautiful street!  The fronts of the stores are even beautiful.  It was definitely fun to see a little of how "the other half llives"!!  All in all, it was a really great visit and definitely worth the drive!!  Tomorrow, it is on to Santa Barbara - then back to Reno.  I am not certain I can do that in one day, but I will give it a go. Thanks for listening.  Ricci

Happy Birthday To You!

The presents were piling up in the corner!  It was a little like Christmas, because I was madly in love and wanted to give him the most fun birthday ever!  “I don’t need presents, Erica – I don’t even care about them!”  Mike was a "macho man" (ha!ha) and wanted to be above the silliness!!  Of course, I paid no attention because every time I was in a department store, I saw something else I thought he would need or like.  By the time the evening before his birthday arrived, there must have been 12 – 15 presents in the corner of the bedroom – all wrapped and pretty.  When he told me once again that they were absolutely unnecessary, I responded that it was okay – if he really did not want them, I would simply unwrap them the next day and return everything!  Well, around 4:30 a. m. on the 26^th of May that year, I awoke to a grown man, ripping open packages like a 6 year old.  Upon asking what he was doing, he replied “Birthdays a so great – you get presents and everything!”  So much for being blasé about presents!  So, love of my life, Happy Birthday wherever you are.  I miss you and love you forever.  Erica

Almost A year

Okay, so here it is – life has returned pretty much to normal!!  To begin with, I thought I would wait to write again until we saw if we lived through today (it being one of the days the world was supposed to end!!), then, it is getting very close to Mike’s 73^rd birthday, in addition to a year ago that he died.  I certainly hope he is happy!  Today, because Meg’s back is bad, I drove to San Diego, CA from Reno NV.  A long drive, but beautiful.  The mountains were beautiful and the lakes were also.  The mountains in California were especially beautiful.  Anyway, I listened to a reasonably good mystery while appreciating my surroundings, buying gas and ½ a tank so I wouldn’t realize how expensive it is, and just coasting along – thanks to cruise control!!  So, thinking I was doing great by arriving in San Diego at 6 p.m., thereby giving me time to get a hotel room, change my clothes and go have a dinner and glass (or two) of wine.  HA! HA! HA!  Seems everyone in San Diego is graduating and the whole world came to see them.  It took until 8:30 p.m. to find a room.  Obviously, business in San Diego is good, because no one was very interested in helping me find a room.  I was by the airport; at an area called “hotel circle”, where, incidentally, “Comfort Inn” had a sign out front – “Rooms Available”.  When the receptionist told me they were full, I said, “there are signs out along the street saying rooms available”.  “Oh yeah”, says she, “I forgot to remove them.”  So after about 12 hotels rejecting me there, one young woman suggested I drive to the beaches – oops!  No luck there, either.  However, afraid I was going to burst into tears, one receptionist at a Holiday Inn (after completing a conversation with her friend for about ten minutes, while I waited) bothered to call another Holiday Inn in an area called Old Town, where, lo and behold, they had a room.  Not only was it $120, but, in order not to have your car vandalized on the street, you have to pay $15 to park in their garage!  (A little like Jesse James without his gun!)  So, okay, I bring up a bottle of wine, open it, have a sip, relax and think I am going to write on my blog!  Well, it is now 9:47 p.m. and I am typing this in Word, hoping I can transfer it tomorrow when we get to Carlsbad, because for some reason unknown to either the guy at the desk or the “repair man”, they can’t seem to get the Internet to work in my room!  So, there you have a little synopsis of a normal day in the life of me!!!  At least there is always that test of my sense of humor.  Hopefully, I will get this in tomorrow.  Thanks again for reading.  Ricci

P.S.  I picked up Meg from the airport this morning (in a much better mood) and we drove to Carlsbad, CA.  We could not get into the condo until 4 p.m., so we went to Norte for Margaritas and a Mexican lunch.  Then we walked down the steps to the water, so I can truly say I have now been “from sea to shining sea”, so now I just have to cover those darned “amber waves of grain”!!  See you soon!!  Ricci

Eleven Months

The love of your life dies - so, what do you do?  You don't own where you live - and, now, you certainly can't afford it!  Worse than that, however, is that you find you are finished with Florida.  Therefore, you gather up enough "stuff" for a two bedroom apartment, put it into storage; try to figure out what clothes to take with you; then search for the gypsy in your soul and hit the road!  You find out you have wonderful family and friends (something you always knew, but had not actually put yourself so literally in their lives!) and roaming around the country is a lot easier than stopping and facing the loss day to day.  Well, now I am in Reno, NV and will be here for a month!  Wow, I have had so much down time since I have been here that I actually have been hit quite hard by the sadness and loss of Mike.  However, I realize that this is pretty normal and I will recover.  So, let's get onto a little bit lighter subject..  First of all, happy mother's day to me and to all of you!  In Reno, I am surrounded by mountains (and casinos).  It is beautiful, but I truly am not a mountain girl.  But, Hogan, who is Meg's dog, loves it because we walk the hills everyday and he can run without his leash!  Thus far, I have seen one sea (Atlantic), purple mountains majesty, and will see the other sea (Pacific) at the end of this month.  The amber waves of grain will have to wait until the return trip!  This truly is a beautiful country and while the circumstances were not perfect, I am definitely enjoying seeing all of it.  I am missing Gina, though, and I hope she will recognize me and still like me upon my return.  Unlike Las Vegas, Meg and I went to a casino, were there for three hours and left with the same amount I brought - which seems to me to be winning!!  Thanks for checking in.  Ricci

NO FORTUNE IN LAS VEGAS

Wednesday, I drove to Las Vegas to meet my friend Eileen and her late husband's daughter and son-in-law.  Since I was heading to Reno anyway, it seemed like a good idea.  And, for the most part, it was.  It was delightful to see them and we had a nice dinner together in the Miracle Mile.  The drive through the mountains - especially from Flagstaff to Las Vegas - was absolutely beautiful.  However, I have discovered that I am not a mountain girl.  Anyway, I digress (as usual).  The last time I was in Las Vegas you still saw the Luxor at the end of the strip when you flew in (also, you could still put actual quarters in the slot machines!!).  Now, you can hardly see the Luxor at all!!  Eileen was anxious to take me over to a casino and walk around a little and I had a little bag in the front seat of my car that I have been putting change in since I left Florida.  Of course, since you can no longer use actual change, I had to take it to the cashier to be put in the counting machine.  I should have just kept the bag of change!!  It totalled $62 after the fee for the machine - and it took me less than 45 minutes to lose all of it.  So, I would say I will not be depending of gambling to make my fortune!!  After Eileen, Susie and Ed left for Florida, I drove to Reno.  That drive was also beautiful coming through the mountains.  My trusty little GPS brought me directly to Meg's front door, where champagne was waiting.  Hopefully, the weather will also get a little warmer and THERE IS SNOW ON HER DECK THIS MORNING!!! Mike would not mind the snow as we are a five minute drive from the nearest casino and he really loved slot machines (and Meg, who is his cousin!).  I will play a few slots here for Mike because he loved them - and I'll let you know if I "hit the big one".  Thanks for reading.  Ricci

NEW MEXICO

Okay, so I left Texas, drove about 10 1/2 hours to Albuquerque, NM, where (apparently, until I arrived!) the weather has been beautiful.  It actually was for the first hour I was there.  Then the wind started - by Monday it was about 55 miles and hour, but I tried to play golf anyway.  It was really, really great when the wind was behind me!  However, as fate would have it, you eventually have to have it in your face.  Tough, tough, tough to hit a ball straight under those conditions.  Luckily, there were three men around my age who were kind enough to tolerate my playing and we had a good time.  Sunday, Mary and I drove up to Santa Fe, which is really beautiful.  The building code keeps the height of the buildings down and most of them are rather like adobe huts - but pretty.  Otherwise, NM is rocky, mountainous and quite windy right now.  So, if you are going through New Mexico, it would be wise to visit Mary and Bill because they are wonderful hosts and take your mind off the weather.  Tomorrow, I will head to Las Vegas and then to Reno on Thursday.  This has been a really fun week (it would only be nicer if Mike was around to share it!) and I am looking forward to moving west.  Thanks again for tuning in.  Ricci

THE STARS AT NIGHT ARE BIG AND BRIGHT DEEP IN THE HEART OF TEXAS

Tomorrow I head for Albuquerque.  However, I have had a great time in Texas with Gretchen.  I have seen San Antonio, San Marcos, Canyon Lake.  I fed a deer out of my hand in Gretchen's front yard, actually got one of her cats to let me pet him.  And we are still friends!!  When we left Navarre Beach, I discovered I had left some clothes in the condo (I think they were on the dining room chair that was inadvertently pushed in.)  Anyway, we called the owner who kindly said he would send them to Gretchen's.  After a week and a half, Gretchen called him because they had not arrived.  After  tracking them, we found they were in the sorting bin in Jacksonville, FL.  Jacksonville is at the far east side of Florida.  So how the US Mail got them from the far west end of Fl to the far east end of Fl before sending them WEST to Texas is beyond comprehension.  So much for our tax dollars at work.  Anyway, I am fine, will miss Gretchen's company, but am moving on (like any good gypsy)!! As usual, thanks so much for tuning in.  Ricci

Argyle, Texas

Well, we just spent 5 days at the "ranch" in Argyle, Texas, with our friend Laura from high school, and her husband, Don.  It is a beautiful 10 acre property with a beautiful house, two horses, a burro, a goat,  3 outside cats, 2 inside cats, a huge black lab and a little corgie.  We had great fun!  There is a huge back patio where we could have coffee every morning.  Several times we went down to the "barn" to feed the horses, goat, burro and outside cats.  Oh yes, I forgot, before we went to the barn, we went to the pond to feed the fish and the turtles!  At the barn, after feeding them, hay was distributed outside so they could have "snacks"!  It was beautiful, the animals were beautiful - but Laura has to pick up a lot of poop from the horses.   Gretchen says it's okay because they eat mostly vegetable stuff - however, I believe poop is poop, no matter where it is from.  Laura cooked entirely too much food (which we happily ate because it was delicious), we drank and made merry.  I even got to play golf with Don and his friend Tuesday.  Not great, but a 106 - which means I am coming back!  Not to say I watch too many movies, but I kept waiting for the cast of Giant to appear!  It is a lovely, lovely house and they were wonderful hosts!  Hopefully, I will get to stop on my way back across the country (whenever that is!!)  Now we are at Gretchen's in Canyon Lake and even still speaking! 
When we got to Laura's I found I had left a whole stack of clothes on  the dining room chair in Navarre.  So, hopefully, they will take pity on an old widow and mail them to me at Gretchen's.  So, aside from Mike not being around anymore, life is pretty good.  Thanks for tuning in.  Ricci

10 MONTHS - AND STILL STUCK!!

You know, when Mike died, everyone said if anything was going to happen to one of us, it was better that it was Mike because he wouldn't know what to do (and they thought he would just sit on the porch, smoke and drink manhattans).  Well, I now think they were wrong!  Actually, I think he would have been just fine.  He would have sat on the porch for a while, drunk some manhattans and walked the dog.  Then he would have gotten himself together and gone back to work.  Eventually he would have had women trying to introduce him to other women and he would have found one who wanted to take care of him - because that is what we do.  We know all the women he met would have liked him and in the natural flow of things he would have found someone to be with.  And, no, it would not have been an insult to me - it's just life.  Part of the reason this would have happened to him is because he would have stayed in one place, either in Florida or back to Ohio near his children and grandchildren.  The gypsy (me), however, had to keep moving and I find I am no closer to figuring out what I want to do than I was 10 months ago!  When we arrived at this beautiful condo in Navarre Beach, FL, I still wanted to push the button on my phone and tell him about it.  At least today I didn't spend the whole morning crying - unfortunately that is because when I woke up yesterday, I thought it was the 7th, so I spent yesterday morning crying.  So, something to laugh at myself about.  Anyway, I am certain I will recover and now I will tell you about our third stop on the road trip.  After being disappointed in Key West and Orlando, we arrived in Navarre Beach with some trepidation.  What a great surprise.  This one-bedroom condo is beautifully decorated, with a small lanai on the sound with a beautiful view of the sunset and the dunes.  A short walk west and we are at the Gulf of Mexico, where we have walked the beach the last two mornings.  We said that if we had known how beautiful this was going to be, we would have just come here first and skipped the first two places!  Sadly, tomorrow morning we have to check out by 10 a.m., but it has been a lovely four days!  We will head for Argyle TX and horse country.  It will be quite a change, but it will also be fun because we are visiting another friend from high school.  Sorry I had to whine a little today and thanks for reading.  Ricci

Orlando

Okay, from Key West we went to Orlando because Gretchen had not seen the Harry Potter ride at Universal.  The hotel was nice - however, I had to park in the south tundra - and they charged for parking, which I really thought was quite unnecessary considering what they charged for a room.  But, because we are who we are, Gretchen and I managed to have a fun time.  Ellen was doing two shows from there while we were there, but there was no way to get anywhere near it.  There were hundreds of people who obviously knew she was going to be there and, while they definitely had advance tickets, they had to sit in the very, very hot sun for a long time before they got to see her.  I am certain it was worth the wait, though, because she is a very funny woman.  Nothing exciting about Universal and I will let you know about the panhandle of Florida tomorrow.  Once again, thanks so much for reading.  Ricci

KEY WEST WE ARE GONE!!

Okay, so I am a lot like the bear that went over the mountain - yep, all I saw was the other side of the mountain!!  Key West is l very long street of bars, shops and drag shows!  You know, I lived near the beautiful beaches for 10 years!  Who knew?  We (Gretchen & I) thought there would be beautiful beaches - like Clearwater, Siesta Key, etc.  How wrong we were.  If you want to walk about 20 blocks of shopping, stop for drinks (very many times because it is very hot - and pretty boring); visit Hemmingway's house - which is a big two bedroom house with a lot of cats and a beautiful garden ( it does, however, have great windows), you might like it.  I will say, we went to a butterfly museum and it was fabulous!!  The place was covered with beautiful plants and hundreds of butterflies flying all around you of various and beautiful colors - who would ever have imagined that there were so many kinds of butterflies?!!  Also, the Truman Little Whitehouse was very interesting, historically.  Mallory Square, which is supposed to be "one of the places to see" is really, really boring!!  Driving across the 7 mile bridge - which takes forever and a day - the water looks so beautiful - different shades of green and blue - just like an advertisement.  However, when you do get near the water, it is murky and full of seaweed - not at all enticing!  We did have a great breakfast at Pepe's thanks to the recommendation of Lynn & Al.  Three nights is just too long to be there.  If you have a boat and can go into the harbor and stay for 2 nights, you have seen all of Key West you need to see.  We are happy, though, that we went.  There were lovely people staying at the same B&B, and we have definitely satisfied our curiosity.  Tomorrow, I will tell you about Orlando.  I know you can hardly wait!  Didn't know you were going to get a travel report, did you?  I am really happy I didn't convince Mike to go there, because it would not have been a happy experience for him!  Now I know why he would never go!!  As usual, thanks for listening (or reading, as the case may be)!  Ricci

OHWHATASCHMUCKIAM!!!!!

Dear readers, I am so sorry to say that I woke up about 3:30 this morning and realized that I was so excited about heading to the Keys, that I very, very selfishly left out a very important part of the trip.  The week before Gretchen flew in, I spent the week with another very dear friend, whom I have known for over 30 years.  We have been through many things together and still have a wonderful time.  We spent the week playing golf, playing the Wii and Scrabble.  Eileen always wins on the Wii and mostly I win at scrabble.  Golf is for fun, but her game is ever improving and my has definitely gone down the tubes!  Anyway, Eileen was gracious enough to put me up between the time I left my condo and the time I left Florida, and again last week.  Although it is not an excuse, I guess she is like a sibling in that we sometimes take them for granted and forget to single them out for thank yous!  Therefore, I humbly apologize for being so self-centered that I got caught up in my own adventure.  And I sincerely hope Eileen will forgive me - and I will make a sincere effort to be more thoughtful.  Thanks for reading.  Ricci 

KEY WEST HERE WE COME!!

Last night Gretchen flew in from Canyon Lake, TX, we drove to Parrish, FL, drank wine and spent the night with my friend, Barb.  This morning, after much lolly gagging, we moved on to Cracker Barrel for breakfast.  While chatting, we discovered that Gretchen had never been to downtown Naples - and since that is where the "other half" lives and shops, we decided she definitely needed to see it.  Besides, we can't get into our hotel in Key West until tomorrow, so we have plenty of time.  The sun was shining, the temperature was perfect, so we went window shopping.  Of course, we entered many of the shops, but did not buy anything!  However, we came to this little funky shop and they had a long shirt hanging on the door that I just HAD to try on.  It was perfect, because it could be a bathing suit cover up, or a long shirt with skinny jeans!  Very, very cute.  Anyway, it was also way, way over budget.  After much consternation, though, I decided I was worth every penny so I bought it.  This, my friends, is where Providence stepped in!!  The salesgirl took my debit card, but her paper in the machine got jammed.  After repairing that, she went to run my card, but could not find it!  At first, she thought she had returned it to me, but she had not.  After 20 minutes, the poor girl was about to collapse in panic.  We knew the card had to be there because she had not moved.  Many, many apologizes later, I assured her I knew she had not stolen it and it would turn up.  Gretchen and I repeated the St. Anthony prayer at least ten times!!  About another 15 minutes and I spotted the card.  When the salesgirl threw the shirt over her shoulder to fix the credit card machine, the card flew onto other shirts hanging behind her. Everybody was happy!!  It took a lot of courage, but I did ask if the wait entitled me to a 20% discount.  No, the manager said, we are giving it to you for half price because you were so nice about the whole thing!  So thank you Providence, I love the shirt - and if this is how fun the trip is starting, I can't wait to see what happens next.  (And, yes, I have thought maybe Mike as helping it go in my direction.)  Thanks for checking in.  Ricci

Jersey Boys!!!

If you haven't seen it, be sure to see Jersey Boys!  What a fun, fun musical.  It takes you right down memory lane!  I really believe that even 30 year olds would have to enjoy this.  The performers are having such a good time doing it, that you surely have to get involved.  However, I had a bit of a setback in the second half because it took me back to so many times Mike and I had such a great time dancing to that music that I spent much of the second half with tears rolling down my face.  It was definitely a "yea/boo"  time.  Yea because the music was so good and boo because it made me miss Mike more than ever - and that is pretty difficult because I miss him so much naturally.  Anyway, I digress!  See Jersey Boys if you possibly can - I assure you you will not be disappointed - and that goes for my own children who were avid fans of The Who and Pink Floyd!!  Thanks, Ricci

Weari' o' the Green

We didn't wear much green, but Barb and I played 36 holes of golf on St. Patrick's Day - like we were in our twenties.  Sun, golf, plenty of beer - and we were ready to crash by 8:30 p.m.!  Would we do it again?  In a heartbeat.!!  The window treatments were finished and installed, so we had plenty of time to play!  We even saw our friends, Lynn and Al in Siesta Key.  That is always a pleasure since they are such nice people.  Speaking of friends, remember Janet and the broken ankle?  Well, happily I can tell you all that she is out of her cast altogether, walking, driving and back to the human race.  HOORAY!

Friday, I drove back up to Palm Harbor to spend a week with Eileen and get everything checked out from head to toe for the trek out west!  Saturday, Jim and Judy had friends over for drinks (of course) and dinner.  They are all lovely people and we had a delightful time.  However, driving back into Briar Patch (yes, it is where Brer Rabbit lives!!) was very sad since it was the first time I had driven into there since Mike died!  WOW!  It is rolling into 10 months and it seems like a minute ago.  I miss that boy like crazy, but I remind myself everyday how lucky I was to have him for 27 years!!  He was always fun to have around!

Monday, a new adventure will begin as Gretchen flies into Tampa and we will depart for the Keys, Orlando, Navarre and Argyle, Texas.  This should certainly be a fun trip.  We spent most of our high school years laughing like fools, and, perhaps, if we continue the tradition, our face muscles will actually "snap back" a little!  I know, wishful thinking on my part!

Meanwhile, Eileen and I have played golf twice so far and are planning two more outings - in addition to seeing Jersey Boys Wednesday night.  What fun!

Gina seems to be doing quite well in North Carolina, but I miss her quite a bit.  Hopefully, when I get back, she will be as happy to see me as I will be to see her!

You know, this gypsy life is quite cathartic and I would wish everyone the chance to just drive around, see people you like and enjoy seeing, with no time restraints or agenda.  I just wish for it to occur in a much more pleasant way.  Thanks for visiting my blog and I will let you know how it is in the Keys!  Ricci

P.S.  Amy and Auri put me on facebook, but I have no idea how to use it!

Did He Or Didn't He??

Well, here I am in lovely Parrish, Florida.  It is sunny, but not quite warm enough.  However, that is not the point of this post.  In the nine months since Mike died, I have not had a dream about him, nor have I thought there was any indication of a visit from "beyond", that is, until last Thursday.  Sound asleep, I dreamed I was in bed with Mike.  I rolled over onto my side away from him because he was asleep.  Later, I felt his arm rub my back as he kissed the back of my neck and said "I owe you an apology".  It was so real, and I felt the kiss and the chill down my spine from the kiss, that I immediately woke up (at 4:45 a.m.) and stayed awake for the rest of the morning.  So, I don't know - was it a dream - or was it a visit.  Either one is okay because it put me in touch with the best of him. And, I have to say, whatever it was, it was definitely a lovely reminder of how good it felt to have him that close to me.  What lovely tricks nature plays on us.  Just had to share this with you all.  Thanks for reading.  Ricci  

9 MONTHS LATER AND A YEAR OLDER!!!!

So, Monday it will be nine months since I lost Mike and I am another year older.  You know, I never thought about missing the flowers, wine and hang dog look because he could not think of what to get me for my birthday - yes, hang dog!!  Mike was the best for day to day living; however, he could not even come close to figuringg out what to do for me for a present!!  Every year it was flowers, wine and an apology for not knowing what to buy me!  Now, you must understand that he did not care if I spent everything we had on whatever I wanted, he just could not do it!!Sometimes it seems like it was only yesterday that I went out into that garage and other times it seems like years ago!!  Either way, it is still the greatest loss of my life!!  So tomorrow I will be leaving North Carolina for Florida, the Keys, Texas and other places west.  It has been a great time in NC.  You know, it is said there is something good in everything.  Well, that is very true.  I always knew I had good and nice sons, but this year has proven what good men they have become and the best is that I got my greatest wish granted - and that is that my sons are now my very, very good friends!!  What a lovely prize to having been the parent!!!  So now I am looking forward to visiting friends in Florida, playing some golf and moving on to satisfying the gypsy in my soul.  While Monday is a sad day, I had a wonderful 69th birthday - and all parts are still working.  Will keep you up on the future travels because I will not be in one place anymore as long as I have been in the places where my children and sisters live.  Thanks for checking.  Ricci 

Another Surprise!!

Okay, so we are rolling into 9 (unbelievable) months since Mike died and I thought I was doing quite well.  And, actually, for the most part, I am.  However, tonight Amy, Shawn and I went to dinner at a lovely restaurant in Wilmington.  There was, though, a table of 3 women and 3 men, all about my age.  Wow!!  Until it was in my fact, I forgot how much I miss the camaraderie of a group of friends, all in the same age group.  Don't get me wrong, the kids have been wonderful to me in Ohio and in North Carolina.  It has been great spending time with my sisters and my friends!  All of the grandchildren have been wonderful to me.  But, you know, there is a connection with friends and couples of your own age that is so nice.  It is called a generation gap for a reason!  Seeing that group of 6 tonight just through me for a loop because it made me realize how much I miss that, not only for me, but with Mike.  So, I guess I am definitely not finished learning - which, I guess, means I am still alive!  Thanks for tuning in.  Ricci 

I Only THOUGHT I Was Coming Back

The weather was beautiful over the weekend and I waited tables at the Treehouse Bistro (a little Tapas restaurant everyone should try!!)  Everyone was in great spirits and I was able to speak volumes about Mike and how nice he was.  Many of the customers had met him several times and quite agreed (well, I guess they actually had to - what else were they going to do??!!)  It was busy again Sunday, but colder.  Today, however, was another beautiful day in the 70s and Shawn did not have to work, so we played golf again!  Friday, it seemed to me that my game was coming back!  Whatever you do, you must never let the golf gods see that you think you have a handle on the game because they certainly will show you that you do not!!  The game was really quite bad, but since I parred the last hole, I will absolutely return to the game.  Next weekend, I will be waiting tables at the Treehouse Bistro again, so if you are in the neighborhood, be sure to drop in.  I guarantee you will enjoy it.  Thanks for tuning in.  Ricci

Golf Again - Finally!

Today, in Carolina Beach, it was sunny, 70+ degrees, and Shawn (younger son) and I played golf.  Beer, hot dogs, a few pars, a few bogies (some really BAD holes), but a clear indication that my game is coming back.  Hooray, hooray!  There hasn't been a good game since Mike died and none at all since October, but the game is on the rise again!  I was afraid I would not want to take my clubs across country, but I will do so and hope it just gets progressively better!  This life is actually pretty good.  There is very little structure, but there is also almost no stress and no deadlines!  I'm thinking the gypsies had  the right idea.  I guess we'll see how I feel by the time I go to the west coast and back.  Hope there is sun and warm temperatures at your house.  Thanks for checking in.  Ricci

No Valentine

Well, Valentine's Day came and Mike never appeared.  It is interesting - other people have said they have had visits from their departed loved ones, but, no, not me.  And I even believe in ghosts!  Oh well, maybe the departed one has to believe in them, too!  Anyway, since Mike wasn't here, I just gave myself a visit to the nail shop and got a manicure - bright pink for spring arriving.  And I actually waited tables in the Treehouse Bistro - a place everyone should visit for the food, the wine and the great friendly atmosphere.  While it is not hot here, it was definitely nice enough to take the dogs for a walk on the beach several times this week (with a light jacket and jeans, of course!).  Tomorrow, I will be playing golf with my son for the first time since October.  Hopefully, at least part of my game will return.  I haven't hit a decent shot since Mike died, and I don't know if it was me, or a curse from Mike for never having liked to fish.  Perhaps he has forgiven me and I will able to beat Shawn soundly - as every mother should.  Anyway,  I still miss Mike like crazy, but am in good health, happy to be visiting North Carolina - and ecstatic to be away from SNOW!!  After visiting Florida in March, Gretchen will be flying into Tampa from Texas and we will drive down around the south end of Florida and through the Keys before going on to her house.  This could be the end of a beautiful friendship because I, like Gayle King, love to sing in the car along with the CD's - and I can't sing either.  Well, after reading this, perhaps Gretchen will pack ear plugs!  However, you will hear from me quite a bit before we take off.  After all, I have to keep reminding you all - and myself- that life really is good.  Thanks for tuning in. Ricci

Free At Last

From the snow, that it!  "Almost Heaven, West Virginia" is what John Denver called it!  Except for whitewater rafting, I normally would not have agreed with him.  However, yesterday, when Gina and I crossed into WV,we started singing the song!!  Absolutely no SNOW!!  What a treat!!  In fact, Gina thought it was such a treat to finally have grass instead of snow higher than her body, relieved herself about 10 times in 30 minutes!!  My niece thinks it is cold here in SC because it was 35 degrees this morning and is only going to 50!!!  HOORAY!!!  There is sun and Gina and I were actually able to go on a mile long walk!  What a treat that was!  So, while yesterday was a sad day, we were brought a little happiness by the sun and green grass!  I guess about 30 states have been eliminated from consideration for settling down in any of them!  Life is pretty good!  Thanks for tuning in.  Ricci

Out of The Tundra (PLEASE!!!)

Tomorrow it will be 8 months since Mike so rudely left me. (Not that he could help it; I just get a little testy when the 7th of any month rolls around)  So, in testament to him, I am leaving the frozen tundra called Ohio.  I have had lovely visits with my son and his family, my sisters and friends, but I am really tired of being cold!  So is Gina - she turned three on the 5th of February and has let me know in no uncertain terms that the cold is not her favorite place!! So a short stop to see my niece in SC, then to visit a friend in Charlotte, NC then to the beach in NC to see if they have escaped all of this!!  My oh my, I really don't know how anyone lives here.  I mean, I know I did as a kid, but my senses must have been dulled because I could not do it anymore!  Had a great visit with our friends, Marilyn and Jack in Euclid (luckily, we did not have to leave their house!!).   When Mike went to Fenwick, he earned a black oiled wood letter sweater, which he gave to me, and it has saved me because I have worn it almost everyday, along with all my other clothes.

For those of you who have read this before, Janet is now in a "boot" and well on the way to recovery!  And I had an unexpected pleasure of having lunch with a cousin from New Mexico, who just happened to be in Cleveland at the same time.  Obviously, we don't see each other very often, so it was quite a treat! 

Next month I will be rolling into 69 years of age and while I feel like I am 30, the mirror sends me terrible things to see most mornings!  Therefore, if either Ellen or Oprah should come across this blog, and would like to give a major makeover to a wandering widow, I would  really, really, really like to be a candidate.  I would even be willing to work for either party to work off the cost.  - Oh well, just a thought.  I started this tonight to tell you all something, but, for the life of me, I cannot remember what it was.  When I do, I'll check back in.  Wishing you all sunshine and warmth.  Thanks for tuning in.  Ricci

BRRR

Okay, it is -2 in Columbus, Ohio.  Certainly it is against some law to be that cold!!!  Not only am I freezing, but it has been almost 8 months since I had coffee in bed!  Yes, for 27 years, I got coffee in bed, courtesy of Mike Maratea!  I told you he was a prince!  One time, when we were really quite angry with each other, I asked him why he brought me coffee in bed when he was still so visibly angry.  He said he thought I was that angry, too, so he wanted to make certain that I would not leave home because it would be "so boring"!!  Can't beat that!!  Additionally, he thought the house belonged to the woman and that if a man wanted to decorate a room, he should just decorate the garage and smile at how the house was decorated!!  Money (whether we had any or not) was never an issue either as he believed my money was mine and his money was mine - as as he had an occasional manhattan, bait money and cigarette money!!  I told you you would wish you had had him!!! Ta Ta!  Ricci

THREE WEEKS FROM EXIT FROM OHIO!!!!

I seem to wandering in circles, I know, but I guess I needed the familiarity of my son, his family, my sisters and a few good friends.  However, I will be leaving Ohio (finally) at the end of the first weekend in February, toward North and South Carolina - then back to Florida for a couple of weeks - then on to Texas and parts west.

At least today, I am doing something useful.  My brother-in-law and I are installing a new kitchen floor.  This will probably be a great test of our relationship.  Luckily, my sister is working so she cannot be forced to be in the middle!  I found, though, that when we decided this would be a good idea, I wanted to call Mike and share it with him so he could enjoy the humor of it, too!  Guess that will stay for a while.

I have a message for Johnnie.  I tried to comment in your blog, but couldn't figure it out!  If you really want to remove wallpaper - mix Downy with warm water and spray it on.   It is amazing!  R

P.S.

Good Morning!  I forgot to tell you the other reason snow is so difficult.  Poor Gina has to find a tire rut in order to go to the bathroom!!  The snow is almost deeper than she is tall!  I shoveled out a place in the grass, but within and hour it was all filled in.  My dedication only goes so far, you know, so we just walked the street until she found a tread mark she liked.  You are probably wondering why she doesn't run away - me, too!!  R 

3 REASONS NOT TO LIVE IN OHIO

Yes, there are three excellent reasons for not living in Ohio.  They would be snow, snow, snow!!!  Tuesday, I drove up to Richfield, OH, to see my friend, Barb, and it has done nothing but snow.  And it is cold, cold, cold and windy an icy and all manner of things not good for human beings!  Just in case you are wondering, Ohio will not be where I take up permanent residence!!  Otherwise, life is pretty good. All parts are working and the car is running!!  Hopefully, it will be better weather next post!  Thanks for following.  Ricci

SEVEN MONTHS

Oka'y, I said I wasn't going to whine in 2011, but today is seven months since the love of my life left for the "other side".  So, it has naturally been a day of reflection.  The last time we  danced was new year's eve of 2009.  He was a great dancer and we usually had a great time dancing, but even then he kept saying he was so tired.  Obviously he was sick for a long time.  But, he was not a complainer and I miss him very, very much!  We can only hope the weather is better there than it is in Columbus, Ohio because he didn't like being cold anymore than I do!!  It is about 13 degrees, gray, windy - in other words, horrible!  And, I will be here in Ohio until the end of  January.  Tuesday, I will go to Richfield, OH to see my friend, Barb for a few days.  Barb is great, but Richfield is just south of Cleveland, so I will not be getting warmer.  The one thing this trip has done for me so far is to remind me why I do not live here.  You have to be at least part Eskimo!!  Even poor Gina dances on the snow and ice to get it over with quickly!  Remember Janet of the broken ankle - well, she had her stitches out and everything, so far, is looking good, so she should only be housebound until the end of February or middle of March.  Hopefully, she has an ample supply of wine!!  Not much today - just to say that life just is missing something when romantic love is not around.  So if you have it, just enjoy the devil out of it.  Thanks for following!  Ricci

How Can You Not Know??

Happy New Year!  We are actually in the year 2011 and it is hard to believe time goes so quickly, as I am certain you all know.  So, my first question this year is -how long can you live with a person and not know he/she has false teeth?  For me it was 27 years!!  Yes, that's right!  About 6 weeks before he died, Mike had an outpatient procedure done and, of course, I was there with him!  He had been given a sedative and was woozy, but just before they took him in, a nurse brought him a little cup and told him it was for his dentures!  He gave me this hysterical look and said "You have to go now!"  So, I did and said nothing about it later, as it was obviously something he thought was important to keep secret.  Well, when he died, he had fallen backward on the garage floor and his teeth popped out.  When the firemen came, I asked them to please put them back as he did not want me to know he had them!  Since the day we moved in together, he had gone into the bathroom in the morning and came out showered, shaved, clean and teeth brushed!  The most amazing thing about it is that his children always knew, but it never came up in any conversation - even when there were quite a few drinks and a lot of teasing.  His doctor was so amazed that I did not know that, he wanted to know if I had ever seen him naked!!  I explained that it was not the same - when you started dating someone, you don't ordinarily ask if he has his own teeth!  It is ironic, though, that the saying is "Vanity, woman in your name".  Guess what, I beg to differ!  However, vanity or not; his own teeth or not, he was the perfect person for me to have spent the last 27 years with - and he has his teeth, wherever he is.  Thanks for tuning in.  Ricci